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Tuesday, January 10, 2017

To the Woman Struggling:

 
Also known as ME!
Y'all! I'm struggling, big time.
I've sat here looking at a blank post page waiting for words. I want more than anything to just post something cute or witty, but right now, my head is just not in a very cute or witty place. My head is just in a raw, honest place, so after a lot of prayers, I feel like God is wanting me to share for his glory!
I've been so hurt over the past two years that my heart physically hurts. The physical affects of these disappointments are evident. My faith, however, has been strengthened and renewed. In those moments when I want nothing more than to just give up, the gentlest hug from one of my sweet kids or a wink from Joe settles my restless heart.
That always wasn't the case.
 
I shared yesterday that we celebrated our 11th anniversary this weekend, and what a sweet anniversary it was. This time last year, if you had asked me where I'd be in one year, I couldn't confidently have said with Joe. We were separated, and my heart was just absolutely broken. His infidelity with one of my closest friends completely broke my heart, and I was bitter. God, however, had a beautiful plan for all of this. He used our ugly mess to turn it into a beautiful message of repentance and forgiveness. God removed so many people from our lives. He basically isolated us, so that He could have complete surrender. He also then began to put the absolutely right people on our path. People who would walk alongside us & help us recover from the wounds of infidelity.
And we have recovered.
Our family is stronger than ever. Our kids have a safe place within Joe and me. I have a safe place with Joe again. We have such a respect for one another, and we have exercised so much grace over the past year.
God is so good.
This post isn't a pity-party or a post that will shine a spotlight on sin.
As I said earlier, I am struggling big time!
Right now, my family is dealing with the same sin that we defeated a year ago, but with my dad.
His infidelity has once again shaken me to the absolute core. My heart hurts, literally! My physical being is absolute wrecked, and I am constantly fighting turning into a bitter woman again. Old scars and insecurities are rearing their very UGLY head, and I desperately am fighting Satan's lure into depression. Satan wants me defeated and discouraged, but Joe keeps reminding me that in Christ I am victorious. The sweetness of last year's trials is visible right now, though. I am so very thankful that I have Joe holding my hand as we tread these unknown waters. We have drawn incredibly close to one another and most importantly we've grown close together to God, and we know that these trials will soon become another beautiful chapter in our family's testimony.
I beg that you pray for me. Pray that bitterness doesn't win this broken heart of mine. Pray that God quickly opens doors and avenues for our family.
To God be the GLORY great things he has [and will continue] done!
#GodIsGood


6 comments:

  1. I want to say so much to help you but all that comes to mind is to let you know that I will pray.

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    1. That is absolutely wonderful! Prayer is the absolute best thing for my situation.

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  2. I love that you were vulnerable and shared this although I hate that you're going through this. You and your family are in my prayers!

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  3. Oh sweetie, know that I will be praying for you and your family. I know that at times we question God (I got hit with a big disappointment last week that has left me bitter...) but I KNOW that he has a plan for EVERYTHING. We don't always know the plan right away, and I know that for me, I would really appreciate knowing on my time, haha!!!

    Much love to you...

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    1. Isn't that the truth!! Praying for you as well! God is still good.

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